I'm a grant writer....research is what I do. I look for facts through all kinds of garbage on the internet and try to find funding for programs. I'm pretty decent at it. Except that now I research EVERYTHING! I could have a best seller if I just printed out my recent google searches.
There is just so much to know, to learn...so many questions....there is no exact science when waiting on magic to happen. I am a faith filled girl, but these days I really like exact measurements. So I keep trying to calm my shit and tell myself that I am perfectly human and my body is designed to do this. It will happen Jaslyn Marie....just chill your shit.
I am not a patient girl and I own it. Nothing in my life has ever come easy for me. I have had to bust my ass for everything. I had to figure out how to finish college when my parents could no longer afford to pay for it and I found a way. I had to learn how heal myself when my heart was broken and become a better person. I have always had to put my big girl panties on an deal with it. But there are some days when I feel completely defenseless against the nagging voice in my head that says." just get over it, it ain't happenin hussy."
And there is just nothing your well meaning friends can say when you feel that way. Today is one of those days, but tomorrow will be better.
Maybe I should buy new underwear today ;)
i'm well meaning and i know it will happen for you and it will be amazing :)
ReplyDeleteSome days just suck. You wake up and all you want to do is go back to bed because you feel like you are carrying around a ton of weight on your shoulders. My advice, say a prayer. Give your stress, your worries and fears to God. You can't research on Google what God's plan is for you...but you can pray about it. Go buy yourself some very pretty panties...you deserve them! I love you and I'm so glad you started this blog! I love knowing what's going on with you!
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